Faith Holland left her hometown after being jilted at the altar. Now a little older and wiser, she’s ready to return to the Blue Heron Winery, her family’s vineyard, to confront the ghosts of her past, and maybe enjoy a glass of red. After all, there’s some great scenery there….

Like Levi Cooper, the local police chief-and best friend of her former fiancé. There’s a lot about Levi that Faith never noticed, and it’s not just those deep green eyes. The only catch is she’s having a hard time forgetting that he helped ruin her wedding all those years ago. If she can find a minute amidst all her family drama to stop and smell the rosÉ, she just might find a reason to stay at Blue Heron, and finish that walk…

*blurb taken from Goodreads*

When I saw The Best Man over at Netgalley, I decided to give the author’s books another chance because I did like the sound of the blurb. Unfortunately, I wished I hadn’t requested this title because I found parts of the book to be very distasteful.

When Faith Holland’s fiance, Jeremy, broke up with her on the day of her wedding after admitting to her that he was gay, Faith moved away from her town and made a career as a successful architect. Faith still hadn’t had any luck in the romance department after making passes at other men who she failed to note were gay. When she arrives back home, Faith meets the hero, Levi Cooper, in one of the most over-used plot scenes in small-town romances by making her race back into town where Levi stops her for speeding (I have read this scene about a MILLION times). Faith has had an intense dislike for Levi because he stopped her wedding to Jeremy. Yes, the heroine dislikes Levi for making Jeremy admit to Faith he was gay before marrying her. And yes, despite Jeremy being gay, Faith would have still married him.

Whilst trying to find love for herself again and settling down to marry, Faith is also matchmaking for her father after a ‘gold digger’ comes into the picture. Faith also has to meet up with Jeremy again and sort out old feelings and hurts. Amongst all this is Levi who always dismisses her with a glance. But when Faith moves next door to Levi, the dislike that’s festered between them for so long changes into something else entirely.

I want to talk about what I enjoyed in the book and then I’ll get to the problematic areas. The romance between Faith and Levi was one of the better romances I’ve read by Higgins in a while. Levi was a typical Higgins hero–he was gruff, silently broody and didn’t show his feelings. Faith was a cheerful heroine whose mission in life was to find love, settle down and do the family thing. I admit it’s hard sometimes to stomach heroines such as this because children are not the be and end all to make your life complete. Higgins has a talent for creating memorable secondary characters that always make an impression, and Faith’s family were an example of this.

What disappoints me about this book is that this would have been a top read but for the distasteful jokes and use of the world ‘slut’ which left the book with a horrible taste. This following section here will contain spoilers, so be warned.

My first raised eyebrow was when there was a flashback to when Levi was a teenager, and how at a glance he knew instantly that Jeremy was gay. I would love to know how Levi had that super power. Secondly, the horrible way in which the author used a transvestite character to be the butt of a joke. That was horrid. Faith is trying to set up her dad on a date, and the “she-male” (I’m actually quoting what was used in the book) is revealed.

There’s also a scene in the beginning of the book where Faith is dating a man, and it turns out he’s married with a kid. The wife arrives to make a scene and I’m pretty sure every word that was uttered at Faith was YOU SLUT AND WHORE. Levi’s sister also makes a casual comment that her roommate is slutty.

I really wanted to like this book but all I could think of is that horrible scene where the transgendered person was called a “she-male.” Why make such a cheap joke and scene aimed at character who, in real life, has to deal with transphobia in their lives. It was a very ugly scene. All in all, I can’t rate this book highly because of what occurred. This definitely will be my last Higgins book, and I can’t say that I’m that sad about it.

I give The Best Man a D.

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Review: The Best Man by Kristan Higgins is a post from: The Book Pushers | Book Reviews | Book Chatter

Publisher: Ballantine Books
Publish Date: January 1, 2013
How we got this book: eARC from NetGalley

Lizette Henry wakes up one morning and doesn’t recognise the reflection staring back at her in the mirror. She isn’t suffering from amnesia; she remembers who she is, what she did the day before, her parents, where she grew up – everything. But who she is, is not who she sees. Alarmed, she begins searching her house for something – anything – that will match what she remembers. There is nothing. And yet there is nothing in her life that seems abnormal, except herself. She could be crazy, but her instincts are telling her this isn’t the case. Some women might make an appointment with a psychiatrist, but Lizette isn’t ‘some women.’ Deep inside she knows she isn’t the face in the mirror, and that she has to find out the truth, before it’s too late.

*blurb from Goodreads

MiscJoy: This story has an interesting premise. When Lizette doesn’t recognize her own reflection one morning, it sets off a cascade of events that lead her to go off her normally routine and uneventful life – or at least as it has been for the past few years. Unbeknownst to her, she’s being observed and the people doing the observing have noticed a potential shift in her patterns of behavior. The trick is – who will get to her first, the man who loves her or the people who see her as nothing more than a liability?

The writing style, unfortunately, did not work for me. I’m not a fan of narrative consisting primarily of internal dialogue. As a result, I felt removed from the story and characters which basically meant I was bored. I would have preferred more character interaction and dialogue but there wasn’t much dialogue at all. This made it difficult for me to get a handle on who Lizette and Xavier were as “people.” Instead, they felt more stereotyped than real.

Has: After reading Running Wild I was hoping that Linda Howard would start to get back on track for me because her last few books have been misses – although there were glimmers of her old magic in some of those books. And in Shadow Woman, there was as well with the romance but the convoluted suspense plot which for me became pretty unbelievable especially with the twists. I couldn’t suspend my disbelief that the events that led to Lizette’s past and hidden history would be due to that twist along with the long buildup which had too much focus and time with Lizette trying to escape the trap she was in. I felt that the suspense was lost for me. The only thing that kept me reading was the romance between Xavier and Lizette which really felt old skool Linda Howard for me. I just wished there were much more time and scenes between them because I liked how they interacted with each other and definitely they had a real spark of chemistry.

Miscjoy: I agree, the pace was too slow to allow any real sense of tension or suspense. There were several plot holes and areas where things just fell apart. Too much time seemed dedicated to aspects of the story that did nothing to move it forward and instead left it stagnating much of the time. I felt the narrative focused too much on the minutiae of a characters actions, for example telling us that Lizette “turned on her phone. waited for it to boot up, scrolled to the contacts, selected the number, hit the green call button…” Did we really need all that to let us know she was using her cell phone to make a call? Additionally, there was too much focus on suppositions about possible actions a character could choose: If Lizette had recovered, she might do this or that; if Xavier could get to her first, maybe he could do this or that; to cover her ass, maybe she would make this decision or that decision. Each time, going through each of these scenarios in great detail while not moving the plot forward at all. Saturating the narrative in this way took away from any actual action taking place through the entire story. It started to feel like a how-to book. I just kept wondering where the story was in all that. Although, I will say I did learn a thing or two about bear and wasp spray. So, that’s good. But in the end, it meant I did a lot of skimming.

Has:Yes! I totally agree about getting lost into the details and the minutiae especially when Lizette was preparing for her escape, I actually got bored with those scenes and I sped read because it was bogging down the story. And that is one of the main problems about Shadow Woman, there was too much of this instead of actual suspense or even romance and I just felt that the narrative just got lost into unnecessary details.

But even so, I do think that the main plot involving the conspiracy behind Lizette and how she became this Shadow of her old self was an interesting premise, but the reasons behind it just didn’t work for me and it was so inconsistent as well as unbelievable. I won’t go into details because it is a huge part of the plot and is a huge spoiler. But I did enjoy the characterisations of the cast of characters. Linda Howard has a great gift in painting vivid and realistic characters and they were well rounded and fleshed out. I just wished we had more focus on them than on the outlandish plot that got lost into details that didn’t really add anything to the book.

MiscJoy: In the end, I really liked the story premise, but I felt the pacing was too slow and the bogged-down narrative prevented the buildup of any real suspense. While there were aspects to the romance that had potential and certainly Lizette and Xavier seemed like they could have been compelling characters, it took too long for the romance to even make an appearance (not counting the dream sequences which incidentally left me flat). Sadly, I was bored for most of the story.

I give Shadow Woman a D.

Has: Like Joy – I was intrigued with the premise and it was a very good one, but its execution left a lot to be desired. And along with the meandering pace which lost any tension and too much focus on details that didn’t bring the plot or the characters forward, the book pretty much suffered for me. The only saving grace was the romance with Xavier and Lizette which had real tension and chemistry and I loved his desire to protect her which is the main theme of the book. But oh, how I wished this was much more used as a focus than the convoluted plot which frankly didn’t interest me and was way out there. I won’t give up on Linda Howard books because she’s one of my all time favourite authors. I hope her next offering is back to form but I am really disappointed that Shadow Woman didn’t live up to her old magic.

I give Shadow Woman a D.

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Joint Review – Shadow Woman by Linda Howard is a post from: The Book Pushers | Book Reviews | Book Chatter

Publisher: Avon Impulse
Publish Date: Out Now (December 4, 2012)
How I got this book: eARC from publisher

When tall, handsome out-of-towner Nick Chandler first lays eyes on Jenny O’Brien, she’s storming into the Bets & Burgers Café, wielding a broom, and threatening the safety of every man in sight. Hey, he figures, she’s got the right to be annoyed – the whole town seems to be laying bets on who Jenny will marry.

Nick’s annoyed as well. He didn’t think he’d have to propose to romance the land away from her, but to save his sister and his ill-fated business, he jumps into the fray and bets $10,000 that Jenny will marry him.

Now the only thing stopping him from seizing her land…may be his own heart.

*blurb from Goodreads

Well. Shoot. This just did not work for me. I thought the blurb had a bit of a fun element to it and I had read a short snippet of the broomstick-and-barroom scene prior to deciding to review this book and thought it had the potential to be humorous. But the story sorta took a different course than I was expecting and I found myself annoyed instead.

The local barkeep puts out a bet on who Jenny will marry because everyone is aware of her dire financial situation. It has become common knowledge that the bank has given her a deadline so now of course she’ll “have to marry to save Windy Meadows” and all the locals think it would be fun to place bets on when and who. First of all: really? Why does she have to get married as the only means of saving her ranch? This is a Contemporary Romance, right?

In general, I did not like the plot or the setup or any of the character’s motivations. There were just too many unbelievable elements to the story and I kept being pulled out of the story with all my eye-rolling. And I never really got passed the (hopefully unintentional) parallelism between Jenny’s worth as a woman being tied to her property…that a woman is property. Of course, nothing was so blatant in the narrative as to suggest that outright. But what else am I to take from the basic premise of the story where all the single men in town were vying for her hand because once they married her, in addition to winning the bet, they would “get” her land?

Nick Chandler is the CEO of NLC Industries. He’s been trying to buy Jenny O’Brien’s ranch because he wants the land. She’s not selling despite being in financial straights. He happens to be in town to try to persuade her personally when the local bar puts out the infamous bet. So he proceeds to make his own side bet with Jenny that she’ll marry him (and in so doing, he’ll get her land that way). So, already I don’t like Nick as he’s shown himself to be someone willing to play with someone else’s life with little regard to the consequences beyond his own agenda. He was calculating and purposefully withheld help in the early phases of the book, waiting until the situation got a bit more out of hand so that when he did step in and save her, it would make him look better. I think we’re supposed to have a soft-spot for Nick because of the situation his sister is in, but it fell flat with me.

Me thinks Jenny doth protest too much. She talked a good game but didn’t back it up. On one hand, she made a fuss about standing on her own. But then she sure seemed to look to others, especially Nick, to save her a lot. She was a bit of a MarySue in that regard. She seemed ineffectual and meek. She couldn’t tell her Uncle Harry not to hire someone even though she owned the ranch. And that became a common theme of not being able to assert herself. She constantly wondered “what on earth was she going to do” and getting mad at Nick for not doing anything to help her. She kept pulling out her boot knife calling it her “protection” but she never did anything with it. When Nick asks her for it, she willingly lets it go when he tells her she doesn’t need it as he’ll protect her now. Gah. Granted, she gets another one later, but that’s not the point. She too easily abjects herself.

The romance never really worked for me, either. The romance seemed contrived because well, for most of the story it was contrived at least from Nick’s perspective. Sure, we’re reading a Romance so it can be assumed that Nick goes from a selfish agenda to more altruistic love-based actions. But that switch never completely turned over for me. I just couldn’t quite forget that for most of the book, he was scheming and opportunistic and he didn’t really redeem himself in the end. What did these two people have in common? There was no basis for a relationship. They never dialogued except to perhaps bicker and oh, yeah, for her to continuously protest how much she’s not going to marry him. But what did they even know of each other? There just wasn’t an actual basis for the Romance and the bet was an artificial starting point especially with Nick basically manipulating her most of the time.

The story lacked depth and the disjointed plot points didn’t gel for me. Neither did having Big Bads as a source of pseudo-tension. And there were several Big Bads (each with their own agenda) which diluted the overall villainous feel reducing them to more of a caricature. The sub-plot with the casino owner felt like something stuck out in left-field rather than an actual character worked into the story. The whole pack trip was just ridiculous as all the local single men vying to get her to marry her went on it. Every thought Jenny had was about how this or that action would make the men “even more eager to lay their hands on her.” She spent the majority of the time being manhandled and irritated that Nick wasn’t saving her from it all.

A contrived plot, a manipulative male protagonist, an ineffectual female protagonist and Big Bads hanging out in the wings with random events thrown in to up the pseudo-tension all resulted in a lackluster story at best. But in the end, what really didn’t work for me was even the hint of a suggestion that a woman’s worth is somehow tied to the value of her property. I barely tolerate that idea when reading an historical but I won’t tolerate it in a contemporary.

I give Bet You’ll Marry Me a D.

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Review – Bet You’ll Marry Me by Darlene Panzera is a post from: The Book Pushers | Book Reviews | Book Chatter

Publisher: Harlequin
Publish Date: Out now
How I got this book: ARC from the publisher via Netgalley

When Detective Logan Riske goes undercover to find Pepper Yates, a potential link to his best friend’s unsolved murder, he vows to gain her cooperation by any means necessary. But the elusive beauty is more suspicious—and in far more danger—than he expected. And the last thing Logan needs is to start caring for her…

Pepper has spent years dodging the corrupt club owner who will stop at nothing to keep her silenced. She can trust no one, not even the handsome new “construction worker” who’s moved in next door. The heat between them is undeniable. But will surrendering to passion bring her the safety she so desires—or will her feelings for Logan draw them both into a killer’s crosshairs?
This blurb came from the author’s website.

I read and really enjoyed Foster’s previous series, The Men Who Walk the Edge of Honor (didn’t realize the series title was so long until I looked it up), so when I spotted Run the Risk on Netgalley I had to give it a try. I was expecting a romantic suspense with a strong heroine, strong hero, tricky villain, good supporting cast, and an engrossing plot. Unfortunately what I got was a very predictable plot and villain, laughable suspense and supporting cast, heroine who enjoyed doing 180 degree turns and a hero that well I never viewed as a hero.

The book starts with the very frumpy, extremely frumpy, frumpy to an extreme heroine, Pepper known as Sue, scuffing her way back to her apartment carrying her groceries. She knows the hero will be standing on his balcony staring at her, he is going to call out her name, and he will meet her inside in their mutual hallway because he ALWAYS does. To me this screamed stalker not hero. And then his stalkery tendencies continued as he waited outside on the balcony for her to give up and come out to grill her steak so he could invite himself to dinner. She continues her new tactic of giving into what the hero wants after a token resistance. Now the Logan’s behavior is supposed to be OK because we find out that he is an undercover detective, looking for her brother, Rowdy, who was the witness in the murder of a City Councilmen. Logan also promises himself that he will be oh so gentle and won’t hurt Pepper. He just needs her to lead him to Rowdy. As time passes Pepper gives into Logan’s charms. She is so extremely desperate for sex, years of inactivity, that with all the lights off, minimal physical contact she reaches insta-arousal, insta-ready for penetration, and then insta-orgasm. This happens more then once.

Of course Logan’s buddies arrest Rowdy when he breaks into Logan’s apartment to make sure he isn’t using Pepper. They knock on Pepper’s door because Logan is over there and Pepper finds out about Logan’s betrayal. She is furious, hurt and guilty because she betrayed her brother despite his warnings. Logan is so sure that all he has to do is tell Pepper he needed to talk to her brother and then everything will be just fine. Pepper escapes from the officers who are guarding her apartment and then goes through this incredible transformation and becomes her original blonde blomb-shell of a self…(180 number one). Then beautiful Pepper goes down to the police station to talk to her brother and warn him. Several events happen and Pepper ends up staying in the cabin owned by Logan and his brother Dash (who both have money) and Logan’s best friend Reece another detective. Pepper is feeling so mad, hurt, and guilty that she teases Logan for a while and then has lights on full contact passionate sex with him…(180 number two). Pepper decides that she can’t hold onto her hurt and anger at Logan when she over hears him talking about rescuing women who are victims of human trafficking…(180 number three).

The supporting cast of characters and their interactions with each other were actually pretty amusing. There was a crooked cop, I am guessing male, possibly Reece but never named who was meeting with the villain. Lieutenant Peterson, Logan and Reece’s supervisor, who wanted to know all the details and have both Pepper and Rowdy under her control. LT Peterson also didn’t trust Reece, she thought he was a dirty cop. Reece was certainly hiding something and he didn’t trust LT Peterson, thought she was dirty, or Rowdy. Rowdy was out shaking down his contacts trying to find the bad guy and he didn’t trust Reece but decided to trust Logan. Pepper didn’t trust Reece, or LT Peterson. Logan’s trust in Reece was swayed by Pepper and Rowdy’s suspicions. Even though Logan, Pepper, and Rowdy didn’t trust Reese or said they didn’t trust him repeatedly they still shared a lot of information with him.

There is a lot more that happens in this story to include the villain and his schemes but they were predictable. I found that the hero never experienced any sort of remorse for his actions in emotionally betraying Pepper and her trust in him. But then again he didn’t have to because she didn’t demand or expect it. Pepper was extremely cardboard and had to undergo abrupt 180s because she didn’t have the depth to transform over the story. The three stooges act of Rowdy, Reece, and LT Peterson was pretty funny but did not add to the suspense or believability of the story at all. When I was writing my notes for this review I laid out who I thought the couples would be the next few books in this series then I took a look at the author’s website. Based on the information provided I think I guessed them all which says a lot about the lack of subtlety in the execution of the plot. I didn’t buy into the romance between Logan and Pepper but I also didn’t think they deserved anyone else based on their lack of character. I was more interested in Reece and his neighbor, Rowdy and the waitress and LT Peterson and Dash. While I have enjoyed Foster’s writing in the past, based on this opening novel I am going to pass on the rest of the series.

I give Run the Risk a D

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Review – Run the Risk by Lori Foster is a post from: The Book Pushers | Book Reviews | Book Chatter

Horse trainer and stable manager T.J. Grady has little patience for anything that doesn’t involve her beloved animals. She’s been burnt before by men who breeze through Barringer’s Pass and think she’ll be an easy love-‘em-and-leave-‘em type, so she keeps to herself and spends her quality time with her strong, patient horses.

Reese Barringer fled Barringer’s Pass years ago looking to escape the privilege—and scrutiny—that comes with the notable last name. He’s made a life for himself (complete with picture-perfect Daddy’s-girl ex-girlfriend) in Boston, but now finds himself in his hometown to take over the resort while his father—the formidable Michael Barringer—recovers from an illness. But city-boy Reese and country-gal T.J. must work together because notorious womanizer/actor Tad Prescott is coming to town and someone has to teach him how to ride a horse. When Tad takes a shining to T.J., Reese finds himself wishing he could ride the actor out of town and claim the hot-tempered woman for himself.

*blurb taken from goodreads*

I have to admit that this blurb reminded me of the old classics by Margaret Way. The settings were in the Outback of Australia, but a lot of those books featured horses and the ranches. I was hoping for a nice romance, but Wild for the Girl was disappointing on quite a few levels.

There was no back history to T.J Grady on why she was so wary of men and relationships. From the first page, T.J is abrasive but it’s never revealed why she is the way she is. It was the horrible trope of all men should never be trusted. And throughout the whole book I kept thinking why? It was such a broad and sweeping generalisation.

When the hero, Reese, arrives back on the ranch to help out after his father was in an accident, a sudden attraction appears. There’s no build up to it or any sort of development. It’s wham bam, I fancy you ma’am. The romance never really develops properly and there’s hardly any tension. The secondary characters are quite awful. There bunny-boiler, Beth, who was bonkers. Beth is the assistant to Tad, the big movie star on the ranch, and she acts like a deranged person. It was so weird and incredibly off putting. Tad was there solely to make advances towards T.J. There was no development of him and Beth. They were caricature characters involved in a sub-plot that never went anywhere. Beth was insanely jealous of T.J, and the bunny-boiler character had a mousy appearance with asthma which I thought was quite insulting.

T.J and Tad’s romance had no real meaning. They got together, had sex and then the huge big misunderstanding comes into play – with the added help of bunny-boiler Beth, and the evil ex-girlfriend of Reese. I was tempted there and then to stop reading, but I wanted to see how it would play out. Firstly, Tad and Beth completely disappear from the pages. The big misunderstanding involves T.J believing a stranger over Reese’s assertions that the ex-girlfriend is an ex. But because of T.J’s past, she has trust issues. As those past issues were never revealed, I was left utterly puzzled.

There was a lot of horse knowledge that seemed factual, but I don’t read romances for horse information. Wild for the Girl could have been a good read if there was a believable goal, motivation and conflict in the story. Reese had no discernible personality. I didn’t know his likes, dislikes and what drove him for his own motivations.

All in all, Wild for the Girl was a lackluster romance with cliched and overused plots. I give it a D.

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Review: Wild for the Girl by Starr Ambrose is a post from: The Book Pushers | Book Reviews | Book Chatter

Years later, successful author Celia Cavalotti is still mourning the death of her favorite teacher, who died in a car crash in 1989. But when a car accident of her own hurtles her back in time to the week of his death, she has a chance to change the future.

Finding herself in the 1980s is a shock to the extremely modern Celia– but even more shocking is seeing her dead English teacher, Alan Forrest, alive and well before her very eyes. Alan is far more handsome than she remembers, and she can’t resist the urge to flirt. After all, they have so much in common, like writing and a shared love of science fiction. Celia knows she’s falling in love with him– but can she use this opportunity to prevent his tragic death? What is happening to her? And why can’t she seem to stay in one place and time?

*blurb taken from Amazon*

A Question of time is a short story, and whilst it has a neat premise, this book didn’t work for me. I struggled with this short story and found it confusing trying to understand what was going on with the time travelling.

Firstly, there is too much information dumping that slowed the story down and halted the action. There also wasn’t a lot of tension between the hero and heroine that kept the story exciting. I didn’t understand Celia’s infatuation with Mr Forest when he was her teacher and why she mourned for him for so long. When Celia goes back in time, I was hoping the story would pick up but there wasn’t any conflict in the story and within the interactions between Celia and Alan ‘Mr Forrester’ to drive the story on.

I also got confused in the reveal in the end with the time traveling and I didn’t understand what happened. It didn’t make sense to me, and I was left feeling very confused on what happened with Celia arriving back in time with Alan, and how there was another time shift and it just got too confusing for me; it wasn’t clear as the heroine wasn’t sure what happened. If the heroine wasn’t sure, then not sure how readers will understand. Whilst the ending did pick up, unfortunately, it was too late. Using a time travel plot in a 90 page book doesn’t work as it doesn’t give enough time to go into detail that’s believable.

I give A Question of Time a D.

Quickie Review: A Question of Time by Joanne Renaud is a post from: The Book Pushers | Book Reviews | Book Chatter

In Eloisa James’s companion story to The Ugly Duchess, Sir Griffin Barry, captain of the infamous pirate ship The Poppy, is back in England to claim the wife he hasn’t seen since their wedding day . . . but this is one treasure that will not be so easy to capture.

*blurb taken from Goodreads*

Seduced by a Pirate is a novella that follows on from The Ugly Duchess. The hero is Sir Griffin Barry, who was a fellow pirate from the last novel, and is James’ cousin. After my less than positive review of The Ugly Duchess, I suppose I have no one but myself to blame for reading Seduced by a Pirate. I was curious to see how the romance plays out as Griffin abandoned his wife on their wedding day for fourteen years, and became a pirate.

The reason Griffin became a pirate was because of how his Father held on to the strict moral codes of the Ton and society. And because of the pure beauty of his wife, Griffin couldn’t perform his husbandly duties on their wedding night. Oh poor Griffin.

So for fourteen years, Griffin happily plays the pirate, plundering the mighty seas and having a jolly good old time. But his pirating ways are put to a halt when James, the hero from The Ugly Duchess, gets his throat slashed and decides he’s still in love with his wife. But Griffin only stops pirating because the same person that slashed James’ throat goes and slashes Griffin’s leg, leaving him wounded and with a limp. And no pirate can go pirating with an injury such as that. So the two return home, and instantly become part of society again, demanding their wives comply with their wishes because the men have returned home.

I call it a whole lot of bullshit.

The heroine, Phoebe, stays pure and virginal for fourteen years whilst her errant husband does his own thing, and that includes other women. But Phoebe doesn’t have any desire of her own, has made a place of her own and she was happy with it. When Griffin returns home, he sees that Poppy/Phoebe (he remembered her name incorrectly. what a charmer) has three children, and he gets all angry that his wife dares to have sex with another man whilst he left her. Oh the shock and horror. But no, the children are not Phoebe’s biological children. Phoebe adopted them after her cousin dies. But she doesn’t tell Griffin the truth.

Dear Phoebe puts up a token protest that Griffin can’t suddenly arrive home, and tell her they will be husband and wife, including in the bedroom. Phoebe can’t help but be attracted to this wonderful man who abandoned her for fourteen years, and he makes her feel all tingly inside. And it’s not before long that Phoebe welcomes home her pirate of a husband, and they live happily ever after. Even Griffin’s Father warmly welcomes the return of Griffin.

*headfuckingdesk*

What riles me up so much is that Griffin feels no guilt for what he’s done over the years. He says if his leg hadn’t gotten injured, he would have carried on pirating. How is that romantic? How is this story romantic?

The woman stays home happily for all these years without any sexual desires of her own, but suddenly when her errant spouse arrives back, her sexuality comes to life and they all live happily ever after, because men do what men do. What’s also frustrating for me is if Griffin wasn’t a selfish hero and there was some other backstory plot other than being a pirate, and no separation for fourteen years, I would have enjoyed this book as the writing is good and the character interactions are great, especially between Griffin and the children.

I don’t think I’ll be picking up a EJ book again. I prefer heroines with some self-respect.

I give Seduced by a Pirate a D

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Review: Seduced by the Pirate by Eloisa James is a post from: The Book Pushers | Book Reviews | Book Chatter

Excess has long been the name of the game for vampire brothers Aldric, Soren, and Luc Fontaine. Now, one of them will leave behind La Petite Mort—New Orleans’ hottest fantasy resort for uninhibited adults—and discover an undeniable desire of his own…

With his brothers Aldric and Soren under fire from all sides, Luc Fontaine should have stayed at La Petite Mort to take care of business. But the chance to get away was just too tempting—and what begins as a pleasant afternoon ride becomes a life‐ and‐death battle with a savage werewolf. The last thing Luc sees is a beautiful woman with honey‐colored hair—and a razor‐sharp sword…

As a powerful immortal, Kassandra has been tasked with guiding Luc into the afterlife. Instead, as she gazes into his clear blue eyes, she knows that the man she is supposed to deliver to the gods upon his death is her longed‐for mate. After centuries of loneliness, Kassandra is faced with the most terrible of choices—perform her sworn duty or lose the one destined to break down her walls and love her as no male ever has. She’ll be damned if she’ll let him go. But to save Luc, she’ll have to risk the wrath of the gods…

*Blurb by Goodreads*

This is the second book in Jo Carlisle’s Erotic Paranormal Romance series, Lords of Pleasure. However it can be read as a stand‐alone book. It contains a lot of explicit sex, including BDSM, m/m, menage (m/m/f and f/f/f/m) and non‐monogamous partners. Although the sex scenes tended to overpower the plot, I appreciated that they were presented in a (mostly) straight‐forward manner without a lot of purple prose.

Bottom line, I did not enjoy this book. I did not find the writing engaging, the plot interesting or the sex titillating. Mostly, I was bored – barring a few scenes that had me wishing for some mind bleach. Although even at that, it was tame compared to the books described in the recent eroticacock post. So, really, I should count myself lucky I didn’t find any flanges, hoods, double‐cocks or semen‐bloated abdomens.

If I could sum this book up in one word it would be: superficial. The story skimmed along the surface, short on detail, never delving into aspects of the plot, environment or character development that would help to draw me in. The tell‐based writing style kept me at a distance from the story. Kassandra and Luc jumped into the hard‐core sex before I even had the chance to connect with them so instead of the sex being exciting, it felt blase. At times I just had to chuckle, not because the story had humor but because I kept picturing a cheesy porno in my head where there’s some attempt at plot but you still know the little bits in between are really just to set up the next sex scene.

The foundation of the plot relies on the Instant Fated Mate Identification (IFMI) trope which has permeated the Paranormal Romance and related genres. I dislike IFMI for many reasons (although there are exceptions*), but mostly because it short‐circuits the romance. When the Alpha determines through some preternatural sense that someone is their Fated Mate upon first meeting them, it doesn’t allow for much relationship building. Especially since the Alpha gets all growly and possessive and starts making declarations of “You’re my Mate. You are Mine.” Really, where can a relationship go after that? If that ever actually happened and some strange person came up to me and said that, I’d be freaked out. Seriously. I’d be googling PPO request procedures and applying for a Taser permit.

In this story, so much of the “romance” between Kassandra and Luc depended on IFMI rather than having the two do any actual work. I kept wondering why these two even liked each other. I mean, you know, apart from the sex. From the moment that Kassandra had her IFMI moment regarding Luc, she removed him from his home world, wouldn’t allow him to return and placed him in a D/s scenario without prior consent. And he just went along with it. Even though she was a complete stranger. Because of the sex. Wait a… Obviously, I’m not thinking like a guy here. Never mind all that then…Luc was in heaven!

Beyond the IFMI trope and the sex, the story is a hodge‐podge of randomness. The non‐sex scenes only provide cursory information and are quickly glossed over. Large chunks of action are summarized or skipped altogether.

• At one point, Luc goes missing. Kassandra looks for him for two days after which she gives up, turns the search over to her guards while she sits at home worrying and polishing her armor. Really? The mighty immortal Valkyrie gives up after a two‐day search for a Mate it’s taken her two millennia to find? Okay. As for this two‐day search, we know nothing about it because the story skips from Luc being suddenly kidnapped to a reference of “two days he’s been missing” after which she then stays home. And why do we have this plot twist in the story? Oh, right, so Luc can get rescued by and have sex with someone else. Silly me.
• Here is an example of a typical fight scene: “Violence erupted. Fists began swinging, swords were drawn – and his rope was dropped. Luc ran like a f***ing deer.” That scene was really tense.
• There is a finale scene involving werewolves that just sort of show up. It feels like they are thrown in there because the author needed a finale and, well, sure, why not have the werewolves face‐off with the vampires? While we’re at it, let’s throw some demons into the mix. Oh, and let’s make the odds really stacked against the vampires because that will up the tension factor. I was underwhelmed.

Luc sucks as a vampire. And I don’t mean that in a blood‐sucking kind of way. In this book, vampires are a bit on the wimpy side, supernaturally speaking. They do have the typical preternatural heightened senses of smell and hearing but don’t have the increased speed, strength or survival/predatory instincts. Or if they do, it isn’t evident by Luc’s actions. He does, however, have a superior refractory period. So, I guess that’s good. It felt peculiar reading about such an ineffectual type of vampire. The narrative described Luc as a worthy warrior, yet his actions didn’t reflect that image. When Luc is placed in difficult situations he freezes, lets someone else resolve the situation or runs. In the early encounter with the werewolf, he doesn’t even attempt to fight back. He just regrets not having brought a sword for protection. I’m thinking “Dude, you’re a Vampire!” Sure, he fights in the finale scene and if that had been part of his character development it would have made sense. Instead, it seemed the warrior in him just decided to show up at the end for that one fight scene after having been absent for the whole book.

I don’t want to spoil the final plot conundrum presented to Kassandra. However, I will just say it disturbed me how casually the narrative presented the idea of taking one’s life as the singular and inevitable solution to losing one’s Mate. This is a theme commonly presented in the PNR genre.

• I can’t stress enough the importance of research. I am particularly annoyed when authors get simple medical facts wrong.In this book, the transfer of “antibodies” in a werewolf’s saliva causes death upon being bitten. That should be “antigens.” The antigen is the infecting agent and is a generic term for anything (bacteria, virus, fungi) that would stimulate your immune system to respond. Antibodies are protein structures used by the immune system to attack these foreign (meaning not part of you) antigens that have been introduced into your body. Although certain types of antibodies do exist in saliva, their transfer via saliva would not pose much of a problem.
• For the sake of women everywhere, a man’s semen does not “jet” into your womb upon ejaculation. Your cervix is there for a reason. Yes there is a very small opening, but sperm actually have to fight their way through it and the conditions have to be favorable.
• Now this one had me LOLing because of the lack of specificity. During a supposed tense (albeit short) hospital scene, a doctor at one point says “Let’s go, I want some tests done, stat.” I’m picturing his staff staring back at him waiting in suspense for him to specify what tests he wants them to get busy doing. Stat. Teeheehee. Next we get “They did tests, one after another, his body encased in that tube that took pictures. He couldn’t remember what it was called.” Ahahahaha. Now, I can understand how a character wouldn’t know what to call an MRI or CT Scanner, but because this description followed on the heels of the doctor’s vague yet urgent order for “some tests” it just sounded like the author didn’t know how to write this scene and decided to skip the research. And it’s really too bad because a simple search on “diagnostic tests for brain trauma” would have provided enough information to give this scene a hint of depth.

And finally, we come to, what were for me, some Mind Bleach moments.

• Mind Bleach Moment #1: semen and cream do not a delicacy make. Throughout the book, the author used cream as a euphemism for semen – that did not make it sound delicious. But then when she mixed actual cream with actual semen and had people feasting on it? That was a no‐go for me.
• Mind Bleach Moment #2: Have you ever had the experience where you didn’t realize you had a limit until you found yourself unable to maintain the necessary suspension of disbelief in order to get through a scene? Well, that happened to me during the erotic scenes involving oral backdoor play. Fingers playing around with the backdoor are one thing (although, hello? Could we get a little Purell®?), but when it came to the oral backdoor play…Um. How do I say this?

OMG! Please let there be a dental dam in this scene! Some kitchen wrap! A pre‐sex enema ritual. Something. Anything is better than the vision that is now stuck in my head. And please don’t be pulling toys out of that area and then immediately proceeding to chow down without washing that area off. Oh. Wait. That still wouldn’t entirely solve the problem here. Why? Because mouth parts have penetrated the anal sphincter. Blurph. It is generally accepted in Erotica Romance, heck even in just regular Romance, that protected sex is rarely utilized. But in this instance, it’s really not about protection from the usual per se. Eau‐de‐backdoor aside, it’s the reality that if you are going to engage in oral backdoor play without some kind of barrier, you are going to come into contact with some stuff (read: poo) that will likely give you a bout of the so‐called “24‐hour flu.” I’m just saying.

My rating: D

*Ok, so there’s an exception in Patricia Briggs’ Alpha and Omega series which I enjoyed despite the IFMI trope. I suspect that has more to do with her awesomeness as an author though.

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About Joy: Being a bit of a hermit, Joy’s love affair with reading began early on in life when she discovered the rich solitude that comes from experiencing a good story. When life isn’t busy intruding, she can usually be found holed up somewhere in her house with a book (usually on her Kindle), a cat or two and at least one dog curled near her feet. She is currently giving her life a complete overhaul (‘cuz hittin’ the forties is a bitch! But in a good way;-) and trying her hand at various creative endeavors including blogging (ok, so I only wrote this one blog article, but that totally counts!), maintaining her farm on Farm Story (yes, that is a creative outlet. Don’t laugh.) and finding ways to cook for her veggie family that don’t include gluten, grains, dairy or sugar (it’s not as bad as it sounds).

Guest Review: Desire After Dark by Jo Carlisle is a post from: The Book Pushers | Book Reviews | Book Chatter

A cursed destiny. A band of warriors. And one troubled kingdom.

It is whispered in Agathia that the legendary warriors of the mist—cursed by the gods—can be summoned only when a champion is needed and the cause is just. Gideon, their captain, knows this to be the one path that will lead his men to redemption—lest they face an eternity of damnation.

Years have passed since anyone has journeyed to the river’s edge, but times are desperate. Oppressed by a cruel guardian whose dark magic threatens to destroy her people, the beautiful and courageous Merewen calls upon the bespelled warriors. In Gideon she finds more than a champion, and in his arms, more than protection. However, their enemies are fighting with a power darker than anything than they imagined, and should Gideon fail, she will lose everything she holds dear—including her heart

*blurb taken from Goodreads*

Lou: When we received this request for review, E, Has and I all jumped at the chance. The premise sounded so intriguing with a fantasy vibe with a band of warriors rising from a lake to take up arms from whoever calls them and if the Gods desire them to. Unfortunately, the actual execution of My Lady Mage leaves much to be desired with hardly any world building, weak characters, and no exciting plot to drive the story through. The heroine Merewen ends up being one of those heroines that I can’t stand. One that is perfect, has no flaws, and is universally loved by those around her.

E: Like Lou I was really excited about reading this and ended up feeling let down. The world had a very interesting premise with this group of fearsome warriors who are stuck in limbo in a river waiting to be called upon to fight. They are serving their punishment for displeasing the Gods and really don’t have much hope left that they will ever see an end to their punishment. I liked the heroine in the beginning but then she was absolutely perfect! I ended up liking her uncle’s wife, Aline, a lot more because she showed character growth. I will admit that I also liked the other warriors better then the hero. They exhibited more personality which is a shame because they had less page time.

Has: I totally agree with you about being really disappointed about the premise of the book. I definitely agree that the heroine, who I found to be pretty bland and boring, was also too perfect, and I was much more drawn to the side character of Aline because she dealt with more darker issues that added to her personality. Whilst I like the idea of the use of magic such as the Avatar shields of the warrior brothers and even Merewen’s power over the horses, it didn’t add much to the world-building which I felt was very weak and bland. In a lot of ways this felt like a PNR disguised as a fantasy and I think this is why I was so let down by the story.

Lou: I don’t know if I would even call it Paranormal. It was just magical, but of the weakest kind. There wasn’t any history of where the magic came from, or how the magic is used and where it’s called upon. I also found the setting to be non-existent. All I know is that it took place in a forest and a big Keep and that’s it. Merewen had no personality to her. In essence, she felt like a Mary Sue character that everyone loved bar the baddies. Even animals loved her and Aline and I thought that was just a little too overbearing in the niceness factor. I also didn’t understand or feel the attraction between Gideon and Merewen. Why was he drawn to her because at first sight of summoning these warriors, Merewen faints in front of them. Oh my eyes rolled so hard at this. A heroine who faints because the warriors she summoned actually appear. And then she doesn’t listen to what they say?!

E: I can completely understand the fear of the dreaded infodump especially in the first book of a series but the pendulum can swing too far in the opposite direction. In this case I think that it did because I am extremely puzzled about what else is out there. Apparently there is an Abbey that should feature prominently in book two I think, three days away is where the real bad guy resides and um that is about it. I also wondered about the attraction that Gideon had from the first moment with Merewen. She certainly had several TSTL moments. I know if I risked my life to get some fearsome warriors to fight for my people I would certainly do what they said because they are the experts. Especially after they explained that if something happened to her they would lose their opportunity. I did really like the shields and avatars and I wished I knew more about them.

Has: Yes, it was all too vague and nothing was really detailed to establish the series. It also didn’t help with the Mary Sue heroine and Gideon was a bit too bland too. I totally agree that their romance was very lackluster and there wasn’t much of a connection between them. I have to admit that it was a bit of a chore to finish the book because everything from the characters to the world-building just felt one big cliche and nothing really stood out for me. I also felt there was no real danger threatening the characters and the villianish Uncle was a bit of a mustache twirling two dimensional bad guy. And because of this, the plot didn’t live up to the premise.

Lou: I agree that everything felt that it had been done many times before, but on a much weaker scale. The only character that intrigued me was Kane with his strange avatar beast, but not enough to pick up another book in this series. Nothing happened in this book that excited me or made me want to carry on reading this series. One aspect that annoyed me was that the big manly men had to rescue and make everything OK for the delicate and precious heroines. Give me a heroine who owns her own life and determines her own HEA anytime over a heroine who is oh so delicate and needs the warrior men to make everything OK. All in all I was very disappointed with My Lady Mage and I won’t be picking up any other book in the series. I give it a D+

E: While I liked the other warriors and Aline I have to agree that the lack of connection between the hero and heroine along with her combination of perfectness yet TSTL moments really annoyed me. I loved the premise of the book but think the execution fell short. I know that the first book in a series can be somewhat rough because a lot has to be done in it so I will give the benefit of the doubt and read review on book two before I decide to give this series another go or not. Growing up a fantasy reader I need my characters and world-building to have complexity especially if it is going to be an epic. Both were too simplistic and choppy to give me that satisfaction. I give My Lady Mage a C-/D+

Has: I feel exactly the same way. Aline, Kane and the Avatar shields were the highlight for me but they were not enough to draw me into the next book because the setting was so weak and I am disappointed because I did enjoy Alexis Morgan’s PNR series but I was very much underwhelmed by the story and most especially with the Mary Sue heroine and bland romance. I also give My Lady Mage D+

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Group Review: My Lady Mage by Alexis Morgan is a post from: The Book Pushers | Book Reviews | Book Chatter

Where did I get the book: Netgalley E-arc

Release Date: Out now

As the Romans storm the last stronghold of Dacia, Princess Ademeni awaits her fate. Taken as a slave, she is deposited into General Marcus Cordovis’s home as a gift.

Driven to avenge her family, Ademeni plots to kill her captor and escape. Though not the cruel victor she expects, Marcus keeps her too close to make escape easy-so close that Ademeni is soon tormented by an unbidden, traitorous attraction. In a moment of weakness, a passionate kiss almost undoes them both.

But the handsome, widowed general has another surprise for Ademeni: a young daughter. Marcus dares ask Ademeni to help him bridge the gap between him and his little girl. And now, Ademeni is growing too fond of those she is supposed to despise. As Marcus prepares for the triumphal march and the opening of the gladiatorial games-where captives of her homeland will be sacrificed-Ademeni readies for her own battle-between revenge and love.

*Blurb taken from Goodreads*

I love all things set during the Ancient Greek and the Roman age and I think it’s because of the time of epic empire building, brutal wars — and yes, those tunics. Heh! So I jumped at the chance when I caught sight of a romance set during this era on Netgalley by Carina. A young princess who is enslaved by a conquering general and despite their differences and backgrounds, they fall in love, which is a trope I really like.

Ademeni is captured along with her sister by Marcus soon after her kingdom has fallen to the Romans, and her father and brothers are killed by them. She then finds herself as a household slave in the house of the Roman general Marcus who has no idea that she was placed there by his ambitious second-in-command and brother in law, Tertullian, as part of the spoils of war. Marcus is uncomfortable with the idea of Ademeni as part of his household — and Ademeni sees this as a chance to gain her revenge on the deaths of her family members, and for the loss of her Kingdom by trying to kill him. When that fails, Marcus — despite being a General — understands her loss and is drawn to her. Ademeni realises that she is able to use this for her advantage, although she also finds herself being attracted to him despite her resolve to escape.

I had high hopes for this book with the setting, premise and the fact it had one of my favourite tropes. It all fell flat pretty much from the get go. I found the romantic tension between Marcus and Ademeni to be lukewarm, and it didn’t help that I found her really annoying because she had several too stupid to live moments throughout the story. I also couldn’t get past that despite Marcus being a figure of hate for Ademeni because of what he represented, he was very empathetic and understanding to her plight and treated her with respect. However, I could initially understand the fact she would feel antagonistic towards those who had enslaved and killed her family. But once she got settled in Marcus’ household, and her role and position wasn’t as harrowing as her sister’s who was placed in Tertullian’s house, I really then lost patience with her reasoning about trying to escape and attempting to kill Marcus or Tertullian. She was impulsive without any foresight on the repercussions on her actions and the way she acted out was not well thought out.

So when Ademeni realises her real feelings for Marcus are more than sexual attraction, it didn’t work for me. The transition from her being against him and what he stands for to wanting to help him didn’t feel realistic. Marcus also had the patience of a saint, and although I preferred his character compared to Ademeni’s, I didn’t get a real sense on what he was really like. I also wished more was spent on his feelings about his first wife as so much was spent being built up about this but the truth about the real reason behind his guilt and feelings left me feeling meh. I also felt it was glossed over and this was a major flaw in the story because a few plot threads were definitely delved very lightly, and there was no great depth throughout the book.  And the ending with the betrayal by someone close to Marcus felt unrealistic, and I was quite surprised by that character especially since they were so aware of the mistakes and the repercussions by Ademeni made that affected their household.

I did like the character of Tertullian who shaped up to be a good villain with his cold ambition to gain Marcus’ position. However, I felt the ongoing plot didn’t really engage me enough because the story wasn’t as strong as I hoped. I did think the author realistically laid out the setting of ancient Rome and that was a real highlight of the book, although several times, the characters slipped up and mentioned modern terms which threw me off the story.

But overall I was pretty much underwhelmed by this book because the romance was lackluster for me and the rest of the book couldn’t carry that off due to that. The setting and concept was great, and I really enjoyed the historical descriptions which was rich and detailed. I wished the romance and characters were fleshed out and developed, but sadly for me, this wasn’t the case.

I give Surrender to the Roman a D+

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Review – Surrender to the Roman by MK Chester is a post from: The Book Pushers | Book Reviews | Book Chatter