Guest Post with Alisha Rai + Giveaway

 

I didn’t know what to write for this post.

I suppose I could have asked the Bookpushers interview me, but then I wouldn’t be able to use the interview card the NEXT time I’m supposed to write a guest post and don’t know what to write. (Secret to success: always think ahead) (write that down) (now).

So I interviewed myself.

———–

Q: Hi Alisha! Your hair sure is looking pretty and shiny today!

A: Why, thank you. I used this homemade rinse—

Q: I don’t really care.

A: L

Q: I hear you have a book coming out. Let’s get your silly self-promo over with so we can get to the hard hitting questions.

A: Yes, Hot as Hades is out this week. You can get it anywhere you buy your ebooks. It’s an erotic take on the Hades/Persephone legend.

Q: I see from the cover that your Hades is ripped, tattooed, and wears leather pants.

A: Guilty.

Q: But the Underworld is probably rather warm. Don’t those chafe?

A: His lair has central air?

Q: Fair enough. Moving on, how do you feel about the bunny threat?

A: I think it’s the result of a few hysterical minds. Bunnies are adorable and fluffy. Clearly they are not the ninja assassins of the world.

Q: They’re…they’re not? Wait. Are you actually being rational about something?

A: Of course. Bunnies aren’t out to get anyone.

Q: Phew. You have no idea how relieved I am to hear that, as I sometimes seriously question your mental…

A: Gnomes are.

Q: Gnomes.

A: Gnomes.

Q: For crying out–like, cutesy, happy garden gnomes? The ones who sit in front of our homes and greet the passerby because we’re too busy watching Dancing with the Stars to do it ourselves? Gnomes like this?

A: Cutesy! Happy! Not you too! Resist, man. Resist this brainwashing that convinces otherwise reasonable Americans into spending money on chunks of plaster that have no real purpose other than killing you and looking mildly constipated. I mean, look at this killer assassin in action.

 

Q: It’s blacked out.

A: They are ninjas, they operate at night.

Q: I can safely say I’ve never seen a gnome ninja assassin.

A: That’s because they’re REALLY GOOD ninjas.

Q: I think we’re done…

A: WAIT. Oh man. I didn’t want to do this. But I guess I’ve got no choice. A few nights ago I went outside with my flashlight and snapped a photo of a rookie gnome assassin fresh from his kill. I’m risking my life by showing this to you. The Federation of Ninja Gnomes will be on my ass. But I do it because I care about you. I care about the world!

Q: …oh dear. A photo, you say?

A: Completely unedited. I don’t even know how to use photoshop!

Q: Obviously. Well, thank you for sharing this, er, important information with us.

A: I assure you, there are no evil gnomes in my new book. A few demons and angry Gods, that’s all.

Q: What a relief.

A: Thanks for having me!

Q: You’re welcome. Don’t forget to pick up bread on your way home today.

A: Okay.

 

Oh Alisha… I don’t know what is in the water that you and Bree have been drinking… but I think you need to send some my way. =)  Alisha has offered up an ecopy of Hot as Hades to one lucky winner. Just leave her a question or comment to be entered. Open Internationally, ends on October 17th. Good Luck!

Comments

  1. says

    Oh wow! Thank you very much for the giveaway! I’ve only read Rai’s “Glutton for Pleasure” so far but I adored it. A menage? A menage with TWIN brothers? AND an Indian heroine? *swoons*

    ReplyReply
  2. HollyB_Herself says

    But what is your take on flamingos and decorative birdhouses? Surveillance equipment? Safe houses? The public needs to know!

    ReplyReply
  3. says

    Gnomes are definitely evil – you can tell. Even though they try to look cute and cheerful, their evilness is evident in their eyes and chubby cheeks. Luckily the bunnies in my neighborhood have been able to keep the area gnome free.

    No need to enter me in the giveaway. I’ve already pre-ordered my copy.

    ReplyReply
  4. Irene Jackson says

    Great interview style there ! I have a small gnome with a fishing rod that has been lurking behind the bushes in my garden for years. He is obviously plotting world domination :)
    Would love to win a copy , thanks for the chance.

    ReplyReply
  5. Sara O says

    Oh my gosh. I literally spit coffee from my mouth reading this. Too funny.
    Thanks for the giveaway, I’d love to win.
    sarace (at) gmail (dot) com

    ReplyReply
  6. says

    @HollyB_Herself: flamingos are in cahoots! Oftentimes, they’ll give the gnomes rides to their next hit. Also, when they stand on one leg, the other’s usually reaching for their switchblade. DO NOT TRUST THEM.

    ReplyReply
  7. says

    Alisha,
    Thank you for spreading the word about the evil of gnome ninja assassins. However, now your ankles will never be safe again.

    Also, beware of jellfish. They are the gnome ninja assassins of the sea.

    ReplyReply
  8. Jen B. says

    Gnomes! That is so funny. I will be sure to take precautions. That “picture” is terrifying! HAHAHA!
    jepebATverizonDOTnet

    ReplyReply
  9. elaing8 says

    LMAO..Awesome interview.I’ll keep a look out for those Gnome ninja’s.
    Thanks for the giveaway.
    elaing8(at)netscape(dot)net

    ReplyReply
  10. Carla S. says

    Great interview. Very funny. Thanks for the warning…and the giveaway. I’d love to read your book. Thanks for the chance.

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  11. JenM says

    You know, they multiply at night when we aren’t watching. Gnomes and bunnies both. They have a secret plan to take over the world. I wouldn’t trust either of them.

    On a different note, I loved the interview and the review. Hades and Persephone is one of my favorite myths and this take on it sounds like it would be great fun to read. I”m adding it to my wishlist right now.

    jen at delux dot com

    ReplyReply
  12. says

    Haha! Excellent “interview.” Hot as Hades sounds awesome, I love it when books incorporate Greek mythology. Thanks for doing the giveaway.

    ReplyReply
  13. Na S. says

    I have always found bad males characters to be interesting and I think so in this book! He’s living in the Underworld which sounds like a great world to read about. Thank you for the interview. Hmm, gnomes are cute in an eeries way.

    ReplyReply
  14. Anne says

    Why did Alisha decide to do an erotic take on a mythological characters? Is a series using other characters planned?

    acm05atjuno.com

    ReplyReply
  15. says

    @Anne: At the moment, this is a standalone. There may be another novella next year with another famous mythological pair, but I can’t say that it’ll necessarily be connected to Hades and Persephone. That will be a while off, as I have a couple other deadlines for actual series first.

    ReplyReply
  16. Sabrina says

    Gnomes totally do look midly constipated! The Gnome rant is hilarious. I had to stop drinking my tea as a precaution when reading it.
    My mother puts dinosaur toys in her garden…usually hidden near bushes etc. She can’t resist them at garage sales/ goodwill. I enjoy spotting them so much more than gnomes!

    Thank you for the giveaway!

    ReplyReply

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